Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Making Eve (posted on my MySpace blog yesterday)

Spewed out of God's Sixth Day WIDE
open post utero mouth, these zygotes,
twin embryos, now grown, one buried
inside the other, tumblefall into Eden.

History's first birth defect.

That story about the rib?
History's first cover-up.

Nixon, listen up.
God did it, too!

No woman to ride side saddle
for long, Eve sharpens overgrown
nails, aliens her way free
through Adam's wimpy chest.
She flirts with the serpent,
finishes off the apple, tosses
Adam the worm and the core.

Original sin. What fun, she trills.

With a shake of her fuck-me frizzled
hair and one hand lifting an,
as yet uncarressed breast, she takes up
with a horny caveman. Their two dozen
mix-breeded children scope uncountable
later debates about Origins,
birth control, and the true
author of the Karma Sutra.

Pris Campbell


Pat Paulk said...

I've often wondered if all positions were practiced/assured of possible pleasureable delight before drawn?? Sorry the ending sidetracked me. Can you repeat the question?

Pris said...

Oh Pat, you're funny:-)

erin said...

I love this, and I love the debate it has sparked. My husband and I are reading 'Velvet Elvis' by Rob Bell, who happens to pastor the church I attend, and he covers stuff like this poem in a roundabout way in his book. In my opinion, and Bell's God would have loved your take on His 'holy' words...

Myspace won't let me comment, because I have neglected it, and you are not on my list anymore, but I will comment here... I love the angle you ahve taken on the story! Isn't poetry about the creative mind making something new out of the already done? Your language is powerful. The bottom line in the garden is that decieved or not, she caused him to sin... thereby sinning herself. She was too chicken to eat the apple herself so she got him to do it for her. Haven't we all been in that position? But when did you claim to be quoting scripture... can't art be art?

The controversy on the other site is awesome... I don't consider myself a feminist, but I do consider myself a Christian, and I wasn't offended. Quite the opposite! I think you did a wonderful job!!!!

Pris said...

Thanks, got it the way I intended it!

I just deleted your profile yesterday. I hadn't seen you there in months, so had sent around a bulletin saying that I was going to delete all profiles that seemed abandoned later that day. If you're going to be using it again, just invite me, okay??

and thanks again. Quite a debate there!


erin said...

will do. thanks... sorry for the neglect.

polona said...

wow, this is fantastic! bold and provocative, and your eve is more lilith-like. enjoyed!

and sorry i haven't come around lately - busy times...

Pris said...

Thanks, Polona
And I've been derelick on comments, myself.

J. Andrew Lockhart said...

very, very interesting! :)

Lyle Daggett said...

Hi, Pris -- enjoyed this. Really a good cage rattler.

As it happens, the first post I put in Cafe Cafe was a poem I wrote in response to Didi's "The Making of Eve" poem challenge. The poem I came up with had a somewhat different tone from yours here, though I also ranged away from the standard story.

It was a while ago, about a year ago by now, though possibly you'd permit me to link to the poem here, by way of a little bit of further response to your poem.

the making of eve

Funny what will set some people off, isn't it?

(Word verification is "oxsik.")

Pris said...

That's beautiful! I'd totally forgotten about that challenge (the mind, the mind)..I would venture it's what spurred me to write this one, too. I've written things that I would never predict would cause controvery and people got upset. As a friend of mine quotes often..'a poet is not a jukebox'. We write what comes.
I can't read my verification word...sighh..will prob have to do it twice:-)

Thanks for stopping by.

Michael Parker said...

I too love your take of the Adam/Eve story, especially creating an Eve as a sensual and smart being. It's a great piece. Congratulations.

p.s. I've enjoyed all of the comments here, as well as those positive comments over at MySpace.

Pris said...

Thanks, Michael. It certainly has stirred the pot:-)

ray said...

i absolutely love this one, Pris!

thanks for being so kind on myspace...

after a while it got a little pointless for me to be posting for just a couple of readers...

i guess i didnt have what it took to go crashing

best i stick to my own :)

Pris said...

I don't know if you'll be back to read this, but I'll check and see if you left MySpace. My readership has been falling off there, too. I don't know why. It seems there's just been a general lack of interest, plus three people who post to me off and on are away now.

I love your writing. Let me know if you have a blog elsewhere or a website.