Wednesday, April 25, 2007

You asked why it's hard to feel loved

When our dinner is done, plates put away,
when witches mount their stout brooms
and the sun hurls its fire towards Australia,
I release what still binds dirty secret.
A freed jailbird, I sing of those nights
I flew into black coffin skies,
saw him do things to that child left behind
who no longer was me, but rather some
golden haired semblence of me.
My stand-in. My prone, breathing
diary of foreshortened memories
incribed by this man, with his back to the moan
of creation, bartering his soul for
one tiny shudder into a child's silenced cry.

I shear off a lock of my hair,
burn it as sacrifice to witches and children
who fly now where I did, give thanks
to the coven of women, my sisters,
whose spells cauterized and blindfolded me
to what no child should bear
in this lifetime of songs sung
en sotto again.


Annie Wicking and Loman Austen said...

I'm not too sure about this poem, a little unnerving... I feel sure it's telling me things so deep so frighting the writer is not sure they would want the world to know, but somehow needs to let the world know the secret they have carried for years....

Just how I read it... Maybe I'm just to far off the beaten track...

Pris said...

I think it's probably best to let you interpret it as you wish. Lots of unnerving things happen to children. Someone needs to speak for them. For them and for the adults they've become. Let this poem be one of the voices.

Annie Wicking and Loman Austen said...

Thank you, Pris, for the poem. Hope life is treating you well.

My best wishes to you and your family.


Mike said...

achingly beautiful. well described. I think bringing in the fantastical in this, as the escape, is the only way to describe the hope child-victims have. It reminds me of Pans Labyrinth, in that way.

Pris said...

Quite a few children, as adults, describe leaving their bodies in this way during molestation or abuse. As adults, they describe seeing it happen from 'above' the scene. It may be the only way many of these survivors avoid the multiple personality disorders that can occur as a result of extreme abuse.

DeadMule said...

Obviously very deeply felt. I'm catching up on some things posted while I've been too busy to comment. I like this. Helen

Pris said...

Thanks, Helen.